Hostile Traveler

Now that I’m back home and have a real internet connection, my level of happiness is much higher. I suppose that’s kind of sad, but I have to come to terms with the fact that I’m a nerd and am very net-dependent. That’s step one, right? Admitting you have a problem. But, at least now I can upload some photos and such for my gigantic audience here. All five three of you. I apologize in advance for the quality of the photos, but they were done using my phone, so they kinda suck. Well, they suck even more than usual.

I arrived in Bloomington on Monday afternoon and quickly realized that there are exactly two points of interest there: the Minneapolis - St. Paul Airport and the Mall of America. Oh, and there’s a big-assed military cemetery that my room overlooked, but I’m not a closet goth or anything, so that doesn’t have much interest for me. Having seen the airport, I opted to check out the mall to poke around and grab some dinner.

The first thing you’re greeted with at the mall is this sign:

(I’m pointing out the middle one, though the one on the right with the pornostache dude is perhaps even more disturbing)

Now, I know I’m not home anymore when there actually needs to be a sign put up to remind people not to carry guns into a mall. Apparently, concealed weapons are perfectly legal in Minnesota (much like Texas), and the very idea of that freaks me out a bit. I mean, I can understand the desire to bring a gun to the mall around Christmas time, but other than that…I just don’t get it. I guess you can’t take the Wild West mentality out of some people that take their constitutional rights way too much to heart. While the constitution also allows people to form militias, it doesn’t specifically say that the rest of us shouldn’t view you as crackpots.

So…the mall. It’s a mall. And yeah, it’s big - three levels of stores arranged in a square around a big open center that contains an amusement park. While I admit that’s kind of a novel concept, it also seems…well, unnecessary and more than a touch cheesy. Before I go on, here’s a few shots of what the middle looks like:

So you get the idea. While it’s a very big mall with an amusement park and aquarium, it still has one basic issue: it’s a mall. Even further, it’s a mall that reinforces a lot of the stereotypical views people from other countries have of us. Gigantic, over-the-top commercialism filled with plodding overweight ignorant Americans. The very idea that anyone would plan a vacation around this place is pretty nauseating, yet I’m told it happens. Japanese tourists come in droves, but if you read some of my other posts, that little fact isn’t terribly surprising compared to the other stuff.

Enough of the mall. It’s worth seeing if you’re in the area, and it does contain a few decent restaurants, but you’re far better served spending some time in downtown Minneapolis. As industrial and relatively unattractive as Bloomington is, Minneapolis itself is really quite nice. More on that in a bit.

This week I was taking a class so that I’m somewhat less useless at the new company. But, again, what’s the first thing that greets me at the office?

(Company name omitted to protect the innocent…and to prevent them from firing my ass)

Apparently, companies have to choose whether or not to allow employees to bring their guns to work with them. Again, doesn’t exactly give me warm fuzzies.

Class itself was fine - I won’t bore anyone with details - but I have to admit that it was refreshing to be one of the people in the audience staring vacantly at the instructor instead of vice-versa. Learning is fun. Remembering sucks.

On Wednesday night after class, I headed into downtown Minneapolis to check the place out. The weather was perfect - 70, sunny, dry, and it’s that time of year where the sun doesn’t go down til after 9pm. Good time to wander around a new place and get a feel for it.

I wound up in a place called Peavey Plaza, and there was a free concert set up featuring gb Leighton, a local band that does a combination of covers and originals that lean towards bluesy rock. They pulled off a pretty impressive version of All Along the Watchtower by Hendrix though, so it was a decent show. Along with the band, there were a bunch of food and beer vendors set up around the perimeter. I gotta say, nice way to spend an evening…especially for free.

After watching the band for awhile, I wandered around the area surrounding Nicollet Mall for a bit, and wound up going for dinner at a British pub across from Peavey Plaza called Brit’s Pub. It’s a massive place, with two floors of indoor seating, two floors of outdoor seating, and, believe it or not, an outdoor lawn bowling green. Decent food, great beer selection, and you gotta love that they have a freaking bowling green. In one of the pics you can also see a movie screen on the wall. During the summer, they show movies on Monday nights while people hang out and drink pints. Definitely my kind of place.

All in all, I have to say that Minneapolis is a pretty nice place. Very clean, some cool areas like the Warehouse District, and very friendly people. But I guess you’d expect that out of Midwesterners. Yah sure you betcha.

As I mentioned in my last post, I’m in Bloomington, Minnesota for work, and I had intended on doing a post with a bunch of pictures spliced in to kind of liven things up. But, I’m in a hotel with the worst ‘high-speed internet’ I’ve ever seen, so I can’t even get a single photo to upload without it timing out. You would think that for $14.95 a day, you could get something faster than a retarded chimpanzee banging on a 19th century telegraph, but you’d be wrong. The saddest part is that this never happens to me when I travel abroad - it’s only when I’m in the states. Hilton can eat my ass - he and his fucked up daughter both.

Speaking of which - does anyone really give a shit about Paris Hilton? And, if so, how sad is your life that you care about some vacant socialite heiress that has done nothing whatsoever to contribute to society?  Every time I flip on the news, there’s some report about her getting out of jail, how much psychological stress she’s under, how she found God. Give me a fucking break. Report on things that actually matter instead of this crap. And yes, I realize I’m only adding to the situation by even bringing it up, but people really need to put some thought into what really matters in life. Oh, and please join me in prayer as we hope that she never decides to breed.

When I finally get a real connection, I’ll have a report on Minneapolis. Exciting, I know…

Okay, I realize that I’ve been a complete slug tad lazy about updating the blog (has it really been two months?), but I have good reason. Over the past couple of months, I’ve been working on transitioning from one job (and employer) to another. Basically, I’ve moved from startup gig #4 to work for a big company, which is taking some getting used to, but I think will be good in the long run.   It’s better pay, more room for growth, and I’ll be working from my home office, so I don’t have much to complain about (though I’m sure I’ll find something to bitch about).   As a result of the transition, I’ve been pretty busy and haven’t been traveling at all, so I haven’t had much of interest to blog about.

The new job is going to be less travel than I’m accustomed to, and the travel I do will be within the US, which will also be a big change.  I’ve been thinking about what direction I want to take with the blog considering the changes in my life, but after talking with a friend, I realized that I don’t necessarily need to be in an exotic location to find something to be annoyed about.  It’s sort of a built-in thing.  So, with that said, let the blog continue, though the focus may be a little more hazy than it was before.  Still some travel tales, but I’ll have to add in more into the general rants category as downtime permits.

So, I’m back, and now on a trip in Bloomington, Minnesota.  More on that later though.